1st Timer

Well, I thought I would give this blog thing a try. I've had a lot on my mind lately and really just need a place to express it. Let me start from the beginning.

Corey and I started TTC in August 2007. After about six months we decided to seek help since I had been charting for over a year and suspected everything was working right with my body. Plus, we were aware that Corey had a varicocele but were told that it wouldn't effect his fertility. His doctor requested that he have an SA done the results were not good. His count was 8 million, it should around 225 million. He was then sent to an urologist, who suggested surgery and requested another SA. This SA came back with a count of 2 million. We hadn't fully decided on surgery but at this point decided it would be best. Corey had a varicocelectomy(I'm sure that is spelled wrong) on February 22, 2008. According to my chart I was set to ovulate on or around February 26th. Believe it or not, we got our BFP on March 13, 20o8. We were so excited and couldn't believe it was finally happening.

Around April 7th I started having pretty bad cramping and some light spotting. On April 9th we went in for an ultrasound and discovered that there was no fetal pole or cardiac activity. At this point my Dr. suggesting waiting it out to see if my body would miscarry naturally, but he said if I would choose to I could have a D&C to end the wait. I chose to have the D&C on April 10th. Right before surgery I was told that my HCG levels had gone up in 48 hours but hadn't doubled like they should have. This made my second guess my decision and not go through with the surgery. I wanted through the weekend and then on April 15th I was told that my HCG levels had actually gone down and my body would miscarry but there was no way to tell when. I went ahead and had the D&C that day.

This has been a horrible experience for Corey and I and I can't tell you enough how much it hurts. To have something you want so much ripped out of you is horrible. We had so many dreams of a wonderful Thanksgiving and Christmas with our little one this year. I'm sure the holidays will be tough this year but not any more harder than the last few weeks have been. We intend to start TTC again this cycle and hopefully we will see that little plus sign before too long.

I just want to introduce Corey and I a little more even though you just read about who we are right now. Corey and I are high school sweethearts who were married on June 18, 2005. Corey works as a Deputy Sheriff and I'm going to school to be an elementary school teacher. I will finish up in December and it couldn't come soon enough.

Here we are on Easter this year. That's our dog Jules. He is the love of our lives right now. We can't get enough of him. He is spoiled rotten and he knows it.