My current worry

Post Partum Depression. I don't know why but this really concerns me. I think about several things, what if I can't soothe my child, what if I can't ever figure out what she wants or needs, what if I realize I'm not cut out for motherhood, what if I go insane from being at the house all the time(that is totally not me), what if I hate my body afterwards. I think about all of these things and it really worries me. I know PPD is fairly common and I'm sure my Dr. will be willing to help me in every way he can but I just can't shake these feelings. I just hope and pray that me and the little girl get along great. I also worry about Corey going back to work. He doesn't get as much time off as I would have hoped. Since he changed jobs in December he can't use his vacation time until the end of May. He will be able to take about 1-1.5 weeks with his sick and discrestionary time but at least 2 of those days will be spent in the hospital. What if I can't do this by myself? Luckily he is in town and it's easy for him to stop by for a little bit here and a little bit there but I still worry. He works 12 hour shifts, what if I need a break? Will I ever get a break?

I think I'm just starting to get anxious and I've always had problems with anxiety. I just need to allow myself not to get worked up. Everything will work out!

31 Weeks

Not much of anything to report this week. The back pain has seemed to ease up a little bit. I'm peeing like crazy and can't sleep through the night. I also checked my blood pressure at Wal-Mart yesterday while I was waiting at the pharmacy and it seems to still be down! :)

EDIT***I spoke too soon. The back pain is back and it is wrapping around to underneath my belly!! OUCH!

Back pain

Since Friday I have been having horrible back pain. It just aches constantly. Even the heat pad isn't cutting it. Any other ideas I could try?

30 Weeks

I had another Dr. appointment today. The good news is that my blood pressure went down. My Dr. asked what I did to bring it down and I honestly haven't done anything. I have cut back my activity level a little. I have only walked a few times in the last two weeks and when I do walk it's a lot slower. I also have tried to teach sitting down, which isn't always easy but as a sub I can get away with it a little easier. I'm not a big salt eater, except for what is already in the food. I don't add salt to anything so I don't know that I cut out a lot of salt. I also didn't quit drinking soda. I did however cut back on the caffienated soda. I think Sonic misses me! :)

We talked about the cramps that I had on Tuesday night. The nurse and Dr. both think they were some contractions, not Braxton Hicks, but the real thing. The were like menstrual cramps but stronger than the ones I have been feeling all along. Hopefully those will stop for a few more weeks!

We also discussed the fact that he won't let me go overdue. I have consistenly measured a week or two ahead since 20 weeks, but that doesn't have him too concerned. He just doesn't think I can handle delivering a 7-10 pound baby. Thank GOD! I don't think I can handle it either. He said we would have another u/s between 36-38 weeks to check her size and then discuss our options. He would like to deliver when she is around 6-ish pounds. Which has me completely thrilled!

I also didn't gain any weight in the last two weeks. So I'm still only up 25 pounds. And I didn't have the rude nurse that immediately put the big block on the 200 mark when I stepped on the scale last time. I am NO WHERE near 200 pounds! UH, I was fuming!

Today was such a busy day! We also went and bought all the stuff for Corey to work on her custom closet. It will have shelving all the way up the middle and two rods on one side and one rod on the other side and then a shelf all the way across the top. The other side of the closet(walk-in) will still be DH's so right now we aren't going to mess with it.

I'm afraid to take a shot from the back so the front will have to do!

Comparison

Well, I really wanted to wear a shirt in this week's picture that I had worn early on. That didn't really work because I'm not sure any of them would fit me at this point. I did notice thought that I wore the same sweater I wore in my 20 week picture. Here is a comparison.

I think the funny thing about this is, I wore this sweater to my work Christmas party and last week when I saw my old boss(I don't work there anymore) she commented on how I didn't look any different than I did at Christmas. I think I should send her the proof! Her comment did make me feel better though.

My birthday is tomorrow! and then birthday week will be over!

29 Weeks

I've got good news and I've got bad news this week. I'll start with the good news, I passed the GD test. For some reason I was really worried about that. The bad news, my blood pressure went up again. I stopped in to get it checked today and it was 136/66. I've been told that the numbers to be concerned about are 140 or more on top and 90 or more on bottom and that the bottom number is more significant than the top number. The nurse told me to watch my sugar and cut out soda *GASP*. Giving up the soda will be tough but I will do anything to make sure things don't get complicated.

In other news, if one more person asks me if I'm having twins, tells me I look miserable or gasps when I tell them my due date I'm going to scream. I'm short, the baby has no where to go but out! Of course I look huge, I'm 5 foot, any belly is going to look huge on me. UGH!

Oh, and birthday week continues! I got my present from Corey on Monday night, after I figured out that the UPS guy left it at the back door on FRIDAY! It sat outside all weekend! This is what I got.http://www.bestbuy.com/site/olspage.jsp?skuId=8975139&type=product&id=1217514942527

It also takes videos, which is quite exciting! Oh, and I got it early because we bet on the Super Bowl and since I picked the Steelers, I won! I chose to get my birthday present early and today's pictures were taken with it. I'm in love!

Birthday Week!

My birthday is Friday! I love my birthday and make such a huge deal out of it. This year is a little bit of bummer since I can't believe I'm turning 25! I really feel old, I don't think it helps that I'm achy and sore right now. Anway, this weekend was fun because the baby has started rolling. She doesn't kick as much anymore she just rolls around. I love to feel and watch this baby roll across my stomach. Even DH was getting a kick out of it.

Working

Corey is working again! I really hate his job. Or actually I hate his hours. I'm so bored sitting at the house by myself all the time. I really wish he could just get on a day shift.

28 weeks

I had a Dr. appointment today. I took my GD test and got my Rhogam shot. My blood pressure was high so the Dr. wants me to start taking it easy. I'm only supposed to be doing day to day activities. He told me no weekend shopping trips and not to go on long car trips. He did say at this point he's okay with me continuing my daily activities though. Part of me thinks it was only high because I knew I was going to be getting poked later. After I talked to the Dr. I had 5 minutes to drink the dreaded orange "soda". It actually didn't taste so bad but I had to fast so drinking it on an empty stomach wasn't so great. I tried to get Corey to take a swig while no one was looking but he wouldn't. After sitting for an hour I went back for my bloodwork. Apparently they didn't do my prenatal screening(I think they did and just lost it, but I could be wrong) so I had to have 5 vials of blood drawn. The lab tech said that she thinks pregnancy agrees with my veins though since it was easiser to get the blood this time than it has ever been. After that I went back and got my Rhogam shot. It stings bad and hurts for a little bit afterwards but it's better now. I then had to sit for another 20 minutes to make sure I didn't react to that. We were there for over 2 hours. I'm hoping to hear the results of the sugar test today. I also have to start going in every week to have my blood pressure checked AND I'm now having my appointments every 2 weeks instead of 4. I think that will really speed the next few months by.

I was going to have Corey take a picture from the front but I forgot so maybe next week I will do that.