Hurting again...still

Corey and I went to church yesterday and while we were greeting each other a lady asks me if I'm having a baby. Now maybe she didn't know we lost the baby (it's been 4 months, she should have known) or if she thought I looked pregnant yesterday. I did have on a cotton empire waist dress but seriously I don't think I looked pregnant, and if I was still pregnant I would look a heck of a lot more pregnant than I possibly could have to her in that dress. So after I walked out in tears and retreated to the restroom for a little while I rejoined Corey back in church and made it through. But then all day yesterday, I was sad. I just couldn't shake. Something in me just snapped and I just moped around all day. I haven't done that in quite a while and I feel like I took some steps backward. Thanks lady in church.

I've been reading "Conquering Infertility". It's been good so far. I think I've decided I need to see a therapist. I think I could possibly be depressed and the book says depressed people have even more trouble getting pregnant. It's just a vicious cycle. I'm depressed because I'm not pregnant and can't get pregnant because I'm depressed. AHH! I want to get off this rollercoaster of infertility. I've been on the ride long enough and am ready to get off.

Corey finish month 1 of his Fertility Blend last night. We go to the specialist in one month so he will be able to finish another month of it and then hopefully we will see some good results.

Oh and I go back to school in 4 days! I can't believe summer is over in 4 days. Where did the time go?!?!