Friday, May 23, 2008

Cycle #10, Cycle #2 post D&C

AF decided it was time for a visit today. I'm pretty upset about it and cried myself to sleep last night. It hurts so bad because I don't understand how I could want to be pregnant for so long and then I finally was and then it was all taken away from me. I just hate this whole thing. I haven't had AF since February and it almost feels like my first AF ever. I just feel like it's a whole new thing when it's not. I really wish I knew what was going on and why this is all happening to me. I know it's not happening to only me and I don't understand why it happens at all. Why do people lose babies? I've been told that maybe something was wrong with the baby and it's for the best. But, f*ck that, if something was wrong with the baby then he/she needed a mommy and daddy to love it and that could have been us. God, if you are reading this please answer my question as to why this happened to me and to so many others.

I guess the good thing to come of all of this is that my temperature today was much better. Last cycle my temps were very low, 96.something before "O" and only 97.something after. Today's temp was 97.3 which is normal for me and hopefully they will continue to stay normal with my post O temps being 98.something.

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